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When A Terrible Day Strikes – Bam#5

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When a terrible day strikes – BAM # 5
By Douglas Vermeeren

An Awesome life is living your life by decision. You are where you want to be, doing the things that excite you, inspire you and bring out the best in you and in those around you.

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But the truth of the matter is that not all days are like that no matter how hard you try and how positive your outlook. Sometimes life is just hard and things seem to go completely wrong. These are all part of our existence as humans.

A bad day does not mean you have a bad life.

So how can a person continue to be positive and seek an awesome life when things hit the fan so to speak? These challenging days will be something that everyone faces from time to time so here are three suggestions on what to do to stay on track with an Awesome when these moments strike.

Have correct expectations – The greatest reason for negative human emotions like anger, hurt, frustration and pain all stem from unmet expectations. In other words, you expected a certain result from a situation and you were disappointed that the outcome did not match those expectations. Think about the last time you were upset with your spouse or a close friend. It will be because you had a specific expectation that they would act a certain way and they did not. Your expectations were not met and you became frustrated, angry or hurt. (We will talk more about expectations in a later article, because I do believe it is important to have expectations and people often rise to what is expected of them. But for today’s article I simply want to share that it with a correct expectation that occasionally things and people will disappoint we can be better equipped to deal with them when they appear.) The beginning of getting through a terrible day is to have a correct expectation that they will occur. The next step of this process is now that you expect that they will show up from time to time is to identify the terrible day for what it is when it arrives…

Identify the terrible day for what it is – So you expected that occasionally there will be tough days and here one shows up. You have identified it. When you recognize something for what it is you gain power over it. Awareness is a massive key to unlocking awesomeness in life. The instant you can identify a challenging day is also the moment you can remember that negative days are temporary. You can also instantly recognize that you are in the circumstance but you are not the circumstance. Once you recognize that the situation will pass and that it is not your identity you can evaluate whether you need to provide solutions or simply let it pass. Many problems will just pass if you give them the needed time to do so. However the majority of problems will require some efforts from you to help them move out of your life. That brings us to the final point….

Move forward and create awesome. Forward motion and moment generally break through most negative funks or situations. It is near impossible for the power of positive and the anchors of negativity to exist in the same moment. I want to be clear that I’m not just saying think positive and everything will change. While that’s a good start positive thinking is only a starting point. for example, if you don’t have the rent money just thinking it will be okay won’t make it so. You need to add positive actions and solutions to positive thinking. As you get moving you will experience a state change as well which will immediately change your thinking and situation. All situations can be improved upon by generating forward motion. Often when negativity strikes people shut down and accept the negative fate. There is always something that can be done.

Not too long ago I had a very negative experience that left me with a bill of nearly $390,000. Naturally the day I discovered this was a terrible day. Some of this debt arose from something that wasn’t even my fault. At first I felt the paralyzing despair that everyone feels when faced with something that seems truly overwhelming, frustrating and difficult. I had bruised expectations of the way something should have happened – yet it did not.

Recognizing that there was nothing I could do in my frustrated state I decided to identify the situation for what it was. I knew this was a circumstance I had to deal with. I knew could get through this with time. I also knew that although I had contributed to this situation it was not a reflection of who I was. Even though I had helped to create an awful situation I was still capable of creating awesome too. I determined I would get through it.

I determined to move forward by exploring solutions that would get me through this situation and allow me to get back on track with creating more awesome. Naturally as I looked for solutions I found several ways to immediately make the situation more better and more manageable. I recognized payment options I could make to clear this obligation. I thought about additional business activities I could engage in that would provide for the debt. I thought about friends I could enlist to help me by letting me sell their services. I thought about talents, assets or gifts I had that I could utilize. Solutions began to appear.

As a result I actually developed a new opportunity within my business. This would never had appeared without the terrible day pushing me for solutions. Often solutions only appear out of necessity. This was a blessing in disguise.

In conclusion, don’t let a terrible day destroy your hopes and efforts for an awesome life. All terrible situations are temporary. If you have a committed and focused effort at making your life better your life will continue to follow the direction you have build for it.

P.S. – One last thought that I think is the most powerful way to shift out a negative situation is to find someone to serve. When you do something for others that helps them it allows you to escape the negative energy of your own problem. Often it is in the midst of this serving that your best ideas for solving your own problems shows up. That’s actually what happened to me in the above the example.

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#BAM, #Douglasvermeeren, #Beawesomemovement, #Beawesomenow, #dougvermeeren, #Overcome negative thinking, #service, #douglasvermeerenawesome,

SPECIAL QUIZ – How Awesome are YOU?

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HOW AWESOME ARE YOU?

A quiz to help you see where you are at and how

you can improve your Awesomeness Factor!

The following quiz by Douglas Vermeeren has been designed to give you a quick idea of how awesome you are currently. It is designed to get you to strive to improve your answers if you are not yet where you want to be. Naturally your answers will change from day to day and as your personal awareness becomes more clear. For this reason it is encouraged that you revisit this test every 30 days. Awesome living is a developed habit that comes as a result of trained thinking. In this world where much of what we encounter is geared towards to negativity a regular positive and awesome recharge is a necessary component of living an awesome life.

DEFINITION OF AN AWESOME LIFE: An Awesome life is living your life by decision. You are where you want to be, doing the things that excite you, inspire you and bring out the best in you and in those around you.

Do you have positive thoughts about your future daily?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you set intentions for your day and specific goals for your life?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Have you set boundaries on your energy and efforts to keep you overextending yourself?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you do things for the praise of others or for your progress?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you sacrifice your selfishness for the good of others?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you strive to progress each day by taking active steps towards your goals?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you leave things better than you found them?
a. Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

When with people do you seek to understand rather than be understood?
a. Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you spend time with those who matter most to you each day?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Are you kind and courteous to those who are not kind to you?
Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you regularly feel gratitude and express it?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you forgive mistakes made by yourself and others?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you perform random acts of kindness?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Are you taking care of yourself physically?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you pause to reflect on the importance of small moments?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you pause to take time to reflect each day?
Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you find yourself preoccupied with technology when in the room with real people?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you text while driving?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you celebrate the victories of others?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you find yourself responding to emergencies?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am willing to prepare my life better ahead of time.

Are you a finisher? Do you complete tasks completely regularly?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

How often are you hanging around inspiring people?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to eek them out

Do you find yourself criticizing others?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to stop

Are you taking regularly daily action to accomplish your goals?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you experience activities that make you go WOW!
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to seek them out

Do you share excuses to keep you from doing the things you know you should?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Are you true to the brilliance within you?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you let feelings of unworthiness keep you from being your best?
a.Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

Do you trust your feelings when they tell you to do something good?
Always b.Sometimes c.Never d.Not sure, but I am ready to do better

How would you describe your day?
a. AWESOME b.Average c.Depressing d.Chaotic

CONCLUSION and RESULTS: Only you can judge if you are living to your fullest and most awesome potential. For this reason I haven’t constructed a rating system for you to measure your answers against a standard created by me for you. That’s none of my business. The measurement you will want to consider is what your heart tells you in how you can improve and be the best person you can be. This is a process and not a destination.

And if it was my job to evaluate you my evaluation would be simple and is consistent with everything outlined in the Be Awesome Movement. YOU are AWESOME and I encourage you to continue every activity that will lead you to more awesome! Don’t be satisfied with who you are today. The you from tomorrow is excited to welcome you to the possibilities ahead. You are Awesome!

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#AWESOMEQUIZ #Areyouawesome #BAM #Youareawesome #Douglasvermeeren #dougvermeeren #Beawesomemovement #Beawesomebook

Awesome in London

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It’s okay… You’re worthy to be awesome

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#BEAWESOMEMOVEMENT

By Douglas Vermeeren

I travel around the globe and have had the chance to discuss the rules of awesome with people everywhere striving to be more awesome. As I have I have found a common concern among these people in my interviews on the streets of major cities and rural communities. I have seen the same common concern appear in the classroom among the youth. I have heard the same concern voiced among those who enter my seminar rooms.

Overall perhaps this has been the most common issue that keeps people from living an awesome life.

My definition of an awesome life is as follows: An Awesome life is living your life by decision. You are where you want to be, doing the things that excite you, inspire you and bring out the best in you and in those around you.

The most common feeling that keeps people from living an awesome life are feeling sod unworthiness.

Unworthiness is any feeling which interferes in your ability to create an inspiring life. It may come from feelings of self-doubt. It can be guilt from unresolved pain or hurt. It can stem from mean things others have said. It can come from a series of experienced that leave you feeling incapable.

Whatever the source of these feelings of unworthiness they are all lies. The state of unworthiness does not exist.

Each being born on the planet is a being of infinite worth. Although we may make mistakes or may find ourselves on the receiving end of negative people, circumstances or events those situations do not define us.

One of the most amazing abilities that humans have is that we have the ability to make choices. Each choice is an opportunity to create a new future. The ability to make a choice is not based on how successful a person has been in the past or determined by the value another may assign to you. Choices are available to all and as such all are worthy to make the choice for awesome.

Often at my seminars I find individuals who struggle with the idea that they are worthy to create the life they desire. The boldness required to move forward with an awesome life begins with belief. In moments where this boldness is required it is not uncommon for doubt and worthiness issues to strike a defeating blow. Overcoming these feelings is not an immediate or quick fix.

I often compare this experience like holding a cube of ice in your hand while it melts. It is not comfortable, but to make it go away (meaning the ice) you have to keep hanging on. As you begin to experience the tiniest glimpses of awesome your faith in your worthiness will grow.

Get started working on yourself now and when the doubts appear keep going. Don’t listen the negative voices that will try to sabotage you and steer you off your true path. As those voices rise from a whisper to a shout have strategies in place that can remind you that the negativity will pass and you need to keep going. A few of the strategies that I think work well are having a vision board, listening to a special motivational song, surrounding yourself by inspiring people and engaging in physical exercise. However, I have found one quick solution that also builds feelings of worth quicker than any other method. And that is service.

As you serve others your sense of worth explodes. You can’t feel bad for yourself while lifting others. It becomes even more powerful as you select someone to serve that can’t possibly repay you.

In conclusion I want to reaffirm that you are worthy to be awesome. Your past may be a reference point but it is not your destination. Go forward recognizing that you can repair any kind of past. You can rise above any haters and detractors. And negative situations are temporary. No mistake is permanent. There will be tough days ahead. But stay the course and cling to the moments of awesome when they appear. When you seek awesome it clings to you.

 

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#BE AWESOME #Douglasvermeeren #Dougvermeeren #Be Awesome Movement #findawesome #beawesomebook

You can’t attract what you criticize – BAM #4

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critics

You can’t attract what you criticize

By Douglas Vermeeren

An Awesome life is living your life by decision. You are where you want to be, doing the things that excite you, inspire you and bring out the best in you and in those around you.

This is the ideal that most people strive for, yet there are many who have a really hard time creating this as the reality in their lives. There are many reasons why they struggle creating the awesome life described above but the most common begins prevention is found in their thinking. Often this negative thinking manifests itself in the form of criticism towards other people, situations, circumstances or objects.

Criticism is a dangerous thing. Not only does it bring in negative energy it also established a fortress that keeps positive possibilities out. It becomes even more counterproductive when the individual criticizing other does so out of jealousy. In jealousy the offender is actually repelling what they what by criticizing other individuals who have achieved or are achieving what they want.

We have all been guilty of this.

As I have been guilty of criticizing others I have recognized that it never produced a positive or productive result. Criticism in my life has never produced better results or made me feel good. The more I thought about this there really has been no benefit to criticism, but it is still such an easy trap to fall into.

While in the criticizing mindset we shut off possibilities to create an awesome life as described above. The longer we stay in the mode of criticism the more it begins to affect others. What starts with a mutter or whisper in our mind soon becomes verbalized. What then is said to others gets repeated as a gossipy statement. These comments do not help to enlist the support of others you may need to accomplish your goals. Instead they let people know that you are not inspiring and fun to be around. You are a complainer.

Eventually the criticism will reach back to the person it discusses. This is when things really can turn for the worse. Have you ever had someone criticism you and felt to thank them for it? Of course not. The criticized person feels hurt and often distances themselves from the critic. It’s a great way to lose friends and create enemies.

While objects don’t have feelings I believe the same energy unfolds. You can’t attract what you criticize on any level.

My challenge to you today is to notice your criticisms and follow the two pieces of advice that your mother most likely gave you years ago:

“You get more with sugar than spice. SO be nice.”

and…

“If you haven’t got anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

Be awesome not a critic. No one is perfect although we are all trying pretty hard to do the best we can. Seek to praise and find goodness and praise and goodness will find you. It’s that simple.

And besides the world has too many critics already. Try being original instead.

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#BAM #BeAwesomeMovement #Be Awesome #DouglasVermeeren #DougVermeeren #Douglas Vermeeren Awesome #Douglas Vermeeren wants you to be awesome #MoreAwesome

 

Be Awesome in London

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While in London we took to the streets to ask people what they felt was the key to living an awesome life. We found some great people with wonderful answers. Here’s a video:

One of the quickest ways to get awesome in your life – BAM #3

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I-Am-Awesome-Close-Up-e1346147344621One of the quickest ways to get awesome in your life…
By Douglas Vermeeren

An Awesome life is living your life by decision. You are where you want to be, doing the things that excite you, inspire you and bring out the best in you and in those around you.

But this kind of life doesn’t come easy. Lots of people want it, but most people aren’t prepared to let go of the things that are in the way. Surprisingly one of the biggest obstacles to living your life on your terms is not the most obvious.

Are you ready for it? Ego. Your ego is one of the biggest things that keeps you from being awesome. Without getting into too much detail you probably already get where I am going with this. If you look at the most inspiring moments from your life you will quickly see that they were not connected to moments where you pushed yourself to the front, manipulated circumstances to get your own way or made someone else feel bad to “make yourself look better.”

Now I’m not suggesting that all definitions of ego are bad. That could lead to a massive debate about what is healthy ego and so on. I don’t want to go there. I believe you can’t be awesome without a proper level of self -esteem. What I am talking about is the level of ego that pushes others down in an attempt to lift you up. That kind of ego and awesomeness cannot co-exist.

True greatness requires that you recognize and respect the greatness in others too.

And if you look at those around you carefully those that are truly awesome never have to tell anyone about it. Goodness doesn’t need a promoter. It always gets found out on its own. (Which is kind of ironic to say considering the image I used at the beginning of this article.)

As I started thinking about, and more importantly trying to practice this principle of awesomeness, I found that I was also more calm and still. I was no longer as competitive to make my points known or demonstrate that I was someone special or smart. I stepped back and started trying o become a better listener, learner and support for others.

The result immediately I began to have more awesome (Look back at the definition above) experiences. I also found that immediately the way others treated me back came more awesome. It may sound kind of strange but as I put myself second I began to experience things in a more inspiring way. The reward was I was feeling further ahead than when I tried to push ahead. Weird isn’t it?

Anyways, that’s my challenge to you if you want more awesome in your life. Put your self interests and selfish ideas second, slow down that ego and let others go first. It’s that simple.

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# BeAwesomeMovment #Scienceofbeingawesome #douglasvermeeren #peoplecanchange #positivepsychology #Lawofattraction #BAM #DougVermeeren #Whynotjustbeawesome #Youwerebornawesome #Youareawesome #awesomenessiswithinyou

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