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The 2 Reasons Why You Quit! – Douglas Vermeeren

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The two reasons why people fail
By Douglas Vermeeren, Creator of Personal Power Mastery

Why do people fail to accomplish the goals and dreams that they select for themselves. It ’s not because these dreams or goals are not important. It’s not that they don’t really want these things in their lives. The dreams and goals are often worthy and inspiring things that would make the participants life more full and rich. There isn’t a problem with the destination of where they want to go. The problems that keep most people from succeeding is found in two different obstacles they may encounter on the way to that goal.

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The two problems that they can encounter can be divided into two groups; Feelings and Fiction. Although you can experience both simultaneously we’ll talk about each separately.

Feeling are the emotional concerns that a person encounters on their way to accomplish their dreams. Often these are manifest as feelings of fear, inadequacy, unworthiness and doubt. However this category of feelings can include additional feelings of laziness, contentment, or a willingness to settle for where they are currently. It can also include feelings of discomfort when it comes to new changes required to get to the new goal.

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We will talk shortly about how and who overcomes the feeling obstacle to getting to your goals.

The second group is fiction. These are the stories that people tell themselves that keep them from accomplishing the goal. Another word for these stories might be excuses. Most people think excuses are not based on a perception of reality but rather a lie that is told to keep progress from happening. This may be true some of the time. My experience has reveal that although excuses rarely give power to the person sharing them there rate occasions when the excuse maker is correct. Some of the fiction they are sharing to escape the responsibility of accomplishment is based on fact. In other words the story a person may be telling themselves may indeed be based on real life deficiencies in the plan, the skills, the abilities and the opportunities needed to accomplish the goal. But while there may be real reasons why getting to the goal may be difficult high achievers always find a way around, over of through the obstacle. We’ll talk more about this shortly because the good news with this category is that there is always a way to keep going.

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So how do you recognize whether your reasons for struggling with your goal is based on feeling or fiction? Recently I was having a conversation with my 18 year old son. In this discussion he was telling me about a goal he had decided to possibly abandoned. “It was just too hard.” He told me as we begun a discussion on this feeling or fiction conversation. He declared that it was both feeling and fiction that was keeping him from success. I decided to test the theory and you can too with anything preventing you from success.

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The first step to determine if something is feeling or fiction is to define it. If you can actually define what it is or what would have to happen to get past this obstacle then it is fiction. It is based on a story you are telling yourself. If you need X to happen in order to move forward it is fiction. If you need X as a resource to appear it is fiction. If you need X to go away it is fiction. The good news about fiction is that you can always get help to solve the problem. The bad news is that if you let a fictional story or external excuse stop you you are coming from a reactive perspective. If you haven’t read about the reactive/proactive theory in my articles yet I encourage you to do so. But in a nutshell proactive people own their situation and recognize they have power to change things. A reactive person gives their power away by blaming external sources and they determine that they can do nothing until the problem outside their control is resolved.

If the problem is based on a story or fiction that you are telling yourself if you shift to proactive point of view you will always find some form of solution of something you can do to either get through, around, over or under the problem at hand.

If the problem is feeling it is always internal. It will often have no reason for being. It will just be a feeling. Feelings are experienced often just because you are trying to achieve something new that you’ve never experienced before. There is no problem with feelings. Feelings are normal and natural. Being afraid, nervous or unsure are natural states. They do not mean you can’t do a thing. Often the result of a feeling comes as you decide to interpret the feeling. Some people get nervous and stop. Others experience nervousness and it ignites within them great power, sharpens their mental capacity and primes them to experience a massive rush.

As I interviewed the 400 top achievers in the world many professional athletes and entertainers told me of the kinds of feelings they would have before performances or competitions. Butterflies was a term I heard again and again.

Power over feelings comes as we recognize that they are just that – feelings. The best way to overcome feelings of doubt, fear, unworthiness or nervousness is to just do it. Commit yourself to recognizer he feeling and then do it any ways. The more you push through uncomfortable feelings the better you will get at it.

So the next time you think about quitting and giving up because of either a feeling or a fiction you tell yourself keep going. The finish line is up ahead and you can do it.

Doug Vermeeren 13Douglas Vermeeren – Are you ready to level up? You’ve come to the right place. Douglas Vermeeren is considered one of the top leaders in personal development and achievement psychology. He is considered by many to be the modern day Napoleon Hill for his extensive research into the lives and psychology of more than 400 of the world’s top achievers. Douglas Vermeeren is the creator of The Personal Power Mastery program which helps you unlock your most powerful self and created positive changes in your life.

http://www.DouglasVermeeren.com

#Thescienceofbeingawesome #DouglasVermeeren #dougvermeeren #PersonalPowerMastery #PersonalPowerMasteryseminar #PersonalPowerMasteryforbusiness

Douglas Vermeeren – Are you Proactive?

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Are you Proactive? What difference does it make?

By Douglas Vermeeren

Douglas Vermeeren ppm 22#DouglasVermeeren #dougvermeeren #personalPowerMastery

 

Being proactive or taking responsibility for your actions and choices is the first step towards creating any success in real life. If we avoid responsibility or choose to be reactive to what’s going on around us we actually give away our power. As we give away our power we also lose our ability to create outcomes that are important to us.

When we live in a reactive mode we become paralyzed and our world shrinks. We give up the right make choices as we by default give this power to others.

You can recognize a reactive person by the behaviours and language. Their actions often appear as follows:

They are easily offended

They blame others

They are often highly emotional (Super Highs and Super Lows)

They get angry easily and often

They say hurtful things

They criticize and judge others

They complain

They wait for things to happen

Find themselves often engaged in drama

Change only when they must

Unwilling to learn or follow

They are often financially broke

Paralyzed when problems appear

Always late

Disorganized

Use contention and intimidation as a tool

Don’t own their mistakes

 

The language they use is often as follows:

I have to

They made me

I must

I can’t

I don’t have the time, monte, opportunity, friends, resources etc.

It happened because of X

Because of these approaches reactive people always find their world shrinking. A shrinking universe is connected to diminishing opportunity and scarcity. You can never have abundance on any level in a setting where scarcity is nurtured.

The good news is that people are neither 100% proactive or reactive. We are all somewhere along a continuum. You are reactive some of the time and proactive some of the time. My encouragement to you is to identify areas where you are reactive and seek for improvement. Even a small degree of improvement will begin to open up more opportunities for choice. More choices simply equals more happiness and success. You’ll also find that taking responsibility sooner and more fully decreases the amount of negative stress in your life. When we take responsibility even for the things we don’t like in our life we immediately gain the power to change those things. You can only change what you choose to own.

DV Photo 1Douglas Vermeeren – Are you ready to level up? You’ve come to the right place. Douglas Vermeeren is considered one of the top leaders in personal development and achievement psychology. He is considered by many to be the modern day Napoleon Hill for his extensive research into the lives and psychology of more than 400 of the world’s top achievers. Douglas Vermeeren is the creator of The Personal Power Mastery program which helps you unlock your most powerful self and created positive changes in your life.

http://www.DouglasVermeeren.com http://www.PersonalPowerMasteryEvent.com http://www.PersonalPowerMasterySchoolPrograms.com

#Thescienceofbeingawesome #DouglasVermeeren #dougvermeeren #beAwesomeMovement #BAM #Beawesomerightnow #beawesomepreview #Beawesomebook #beawesomemovie #Douglasvermeerenawesome  #YourFutureisAwesome #PersonalPowerMastery #Personal Power Mastery #Personal Power Mastery School Programs
An Awesome life is living your life by decision. You are where you want to be, doing the things that excite you, inspire you and bring out the best in you and in those around you.

 

Personal Power Mastery Intro session curriculum

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Personal Power Mastery

Personal Power Mastery 1

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Douglas Vermeeren PPM 1For more information about the upcoming seminars near you go to http://www.PersonalPowerMasteryEvent.com or http://www.DouglasVermeeren.com

Our Natural Way is Negative – Bam#9

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Our natural way is negative – BAM# 9
By Douglas Vermeeren

stop-negativity

It doesn’t take long to see the negativity in the world around us. It seems everywhere you go there is negativity reported in the media, negative posts about people on facebook, gossip slander, haters and trolls online and whispering criticism at work, school and even in homes. It is a very difficult world to navigate if you are hoping to stay positive and surround yourself with inspiring people. Yet it is possible and even when surrounded with negative people it is possible to stay positive if you recognize why negativity is such a big part of our life.

Much of our tendency to become negative can be easily traced back to our human ancestors. Negativity is a form of survival. In order to stay alive our early human ancestors had to be very aware of threats tot heir survival and existence. As a result they had to become suspicious of things that we take for granted. In a world where so many things could be a threat it became necessary to be on the defensive. I guess you could say that our ancestors became so good at it that it became par tot our natural out look.

As things evolved and progressed survival became easier but the habit of being on guard stayed with us. Our environment – parents, community, society – had been trained to be on the look out for negativity and was determined to point it out. Often times the intention is still to protect those we interact with. Think of the last time you spoke ill of someone else to others. Was it specifically to bash the person being talked about it was it to protect the person you were talking to. In my case, I was at an event and someone told me about the history of another speaker. They warned me by illustrating a negative experience they had had with this person. Naturally you and I are wise enough to recognize that there are two sides to every story and often times simple misunderstandings can be blown out of proportion publicly and privately. But I did recognize as this person spoke to me that their interest was more in line to protect me rather than destroy the person I was being warned about.

So how can we control our response to the negativity around us? How can we remain focused on the positive How can we be inspiring ourselves? How can we shine like a light in a tunnel of darkness?

I have two suggestions.

1.Recognize the negativity for what it is and where it’s coming from. In doing so I want to be very clear! This does not mean endorsing it. This does not mean participating to empathize with the other person. This does not mean feeding it in any way. In fact, recognizing the negativity is as simple as saying that you see what’s happening and what the source is. It’s like wet paint. It’s possible to know the paint is wet without touching it. Especially if the sign is big and clear. (But just like with the wet paint the temptation to touch is there. Don’t touch.)

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2. Remove yourself. Continuing the analogy of the wet paint you would stick your fingers in it and draw pictures or sit down in the paint. You would leave it alone. Like the paint the minute you touch it it is on you too. Negativity also sticks to those who stick their fingers in it. Often times it may feel difficult to remove yourself. Especially when the person sharing the negativity has you engaged in a conversation. However I have found that if you don’t feed their negativity or endorse what they are saying they soon discontinue. (As a side note it has been interesting to feel the emotion that accompanies this awkward moment when the other person doesn’t engage in the negativity. It’s slightly embarrassing and often the person being negative tries to backtrack or recall what has been said. These emotions alone should give you evidence to recognize that this kind of talk is not on the right track.)

3.Realign yourself. Once you have left the negative situation it is important to realign yourself to your positive state and mission. This is something I recommend you do often anyways as there are so many times in a day that we interact with negative circumstances and situations that often we don’t even know we’ve encountered it.Realigning yourself is almost like washing off whatever negativity happened to sneeze on you without your control. You don’t want to be influenced by the negativity in any way.

Remaining positive in a negative world requires effort. It also requires constant addition of positive to your life. One analogy I like to use in our seminars in regards to being positive is this. Everyone is like a glass of water that is full of everything we let into our life. Most people have a mixture of positive and negative. This glass is also the lens through which we see the world. (But more on that later.) The glass is full and the only way to get more positive than negative and to keep the negative out is to fill the glass so full of positive that there is no room for negative.

Glass-of-Water

My challenge to you is to find more positive today and fill your glass with positive everyday. And every time you encounter negative follow the escape and cleaning route outlined above – Recognize, Remove, Realign.

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An Awesome life is living your life by decision. You are where you want to be, doing the things that excite you, inspire you and bring out the best in you and in those around you.

#Thescienceofbeingawesome #DouglasVermeeren #dougvermeeren #beAwesomeMovement #BAM #Beawesomerightnow #beawesomepreview #Beawesomebook #beawesomemovie #Douglasvermeerenawesome  #YourFutureisAwesome

When A Terrible Day Strikes – Bam#5

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When a terrible day strikes – BAM # 5
By Douglas Vermeeren

An Awesome life is living your life by decision. You are where you want to be, doing the things that excite you, inspire you and bring out the best in you and in those around you.

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But the truth of the matter is that not all days are like that no matter how hard you try and how positive your outlook. Sometimes life is just hard and things seem to go completely wrong. These are all part of our existence as humans.

A bad day does not mean you have a bad life.

So how can a person continue to be positive and seek an awesome life when things hit the fan so to speak? These challenging days will be something that everyone faces from time to time so here are three suggestions on what to do to stay on track with an Awesome when these moments strike.

Have correct expectations – The greatest reason for negative human emotions like anger, hurt, frustration and pain all stem from unmet expectations. In other words, you expected a certain result from a situation and you were disappointed that the outcome did not match those expectations. Think about the last time you were upset with your spouse or a close friend. It will be because you had a specific expectation that they would act a certain way and they did not. Your expectations were not met and you became frustrated, angry or hurt. (We will talk more about expectations in a later article, because I do believe it is important to have expectations and people often rise to what is expected of them. But for today’s article I simply want to share that it with a correct expectation that occasionally things and people will disappoint we can be better equipped to deal with them when they appear.) The beginning of getting through a terrible day is to have a correct expectation that they will occur. The next step of this process is now that you expect that they will show up from time to time is to identify the terrible day for what it is when it arrives…

Identify the terrible day for what it is – So you expected that occasionally there will be tough days and here one shows up. You have identified it. When you recognize something for what it is you gain power over it. Awareness is a massive key to unlocking awesomeness in life. The instant you can identify a challenging day is also the moment you can remember that negative days are temporary. You can also instantly recognize that you are in the circumstance but you are not the circumstance. Once you recognize that the situation will pass and that it is not your identity you can evaluate whether you need to provide solutions or simply let it pass. Many problems will just pass if you give them the needed time to do so. However the majority of problems will require some efforts from you to help them move out of your life. That brings us to the final point….

Move forward and create awesome. Forward motion and moment generally break through most negative funks or situations. It is near impossible for the power of positive and the anchors of negativity to exist in the same moment. I want to be clear that I’m not just saying think positive and everything will change. While that’s a good start positive thinking is only a starting point. for example, if you don’t have the rent money just thinking it will be okay won’t make it so. You need to add positive actions and solutions to positive thinking. As you get moving you will experience a state change as well which will immediately change your thinking and situation. All situations can be improved upon by generating forward motion. Often when negativity strikes people shut down and accept the negative fate. There is always something that can be done.

Not too long ago I had a very negative experience that left me with a bill of nearly $390,000. Naturally the day I discovered this was a terrible day. Some of this debt arose from something that wasn’t even my fault. At first I felt the paralyzing despair that everyone feels when faced with something that seems truly overwhelming, frustrating and difficult. I had bruised expectations of the way something should have happened – yet it did not.

Recognizing that there was nothing I could do in my frustrated state I decided to identify the situation for what it was. I knew this was a circumstance I had to deal with. I knew could get through this with time. I also knew that although I had contributed to this situation it was not a reflection of who I was. Even though I had helped to create an awful situation I was still capable of creating awesome too. I determined I would get through it.

I determined to move forward by exploring solutions that would get me through this situation and allow me to get back on track with creating more awesome. Naturally as I looked for solutions I found several ways to immediately make the situation more better and more manageable. I recognized payment options I could make to clear this obligation. I thought about additional business activities I could engage in that would provide for the debt. I thought about friends I could enlist to help me by letting me sell their services. I thought about talents, assets or gifts I had that I could utilize. Solutions began to appear.

As a result I actually developed a new opportunity within my business. This would never had appeared without the terrible day pushing me for solutions. Often solutions only appear out of necessity. This was a blessing in disguise.

In conclusion, don’t let a terrible day destroy your hopes and efforts for an awesome life. All terrible situations are temporary. If you have a committed and focused effort at making your life better your life will continue to follow the direction you have build for it.

P.S. – One last thought that I think is the most powerful way to shift out a negative situation is to find someone to serve. When you do something for others that helps them it allows you to escape the negative energy of your own problem. Often it is in the midst of this serving that your best ideas for solving your own problems shows up. That’s actually what happened to me in the above the example.

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#BAM, #Douglasvermeeren, #Beawesomemovement, #Beawesomenow, #dougvermeeren, #Overcome negative thinking, #service, #douglasvermeerenawesome,

Millionaire Training Systems Douglas Vermeeren 1-3

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Millionaire Training Systems Douglas Vermeeren 1-3

Wealth comes more easily when your purpose is service and not money. – Douglas Vermeeren

Written by douglasvermeeren

December 2, 2013 at 11:41 pm

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