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Posts Tagged ‘new comics

Stupid Motivational quotes #2

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The most important person to fall in love with is yourself. From there you can love others.

So tonight I’m going to take myself on a date.

It’ll be awkward when I pick myself up and meet my parents.

The goodnight kiss might be a bit of a challenge too.

ramo flores

8 Phrases the Royal family never uses

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https://ca.yahoo.com/style/8-words-royal-family-never-102004874.html

Thought this was interesting. Here are 8 more phrase you probably won’t hear from these guys:

1)Any sentence ending in the word “Dude.”
2)”This tea sucks.”
3)”Supersize that for me, will ya.”
4)”Can I try on your hat?”
5) “Put a cap in his ass.”
6) Prince William, “Do these slacks make my butt look fat?”
7) “Can I wave like a normal person?”
8) “What exactly is my job description?”

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Why do you close your eyes?

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Yesterday someone said to me: “We close our eyes when we pray, dream and kiss. Closing our eyes is associated with feelings.”

As for me I close my eyes when I yawn, have something thrown at me or get soap in my eyes.

Isn’t that romantic.

Close-Your-Eyes-On-This-Lift

Stupid Motivational quotes #1

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Obstacles are things people see when they take their eyes off the goal.

unspecified-copyHave you ever tried that in traffic? Doesn’t work for others cars, stop signs or pedestrians.

the top 5 handshakes that I HATE

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handshake

The top 5 Handshakes I HATE to get:

1. The handshake where they won’t ever let go like your engaged or something.

2.Crushing handshakes that lives your crumpled up hand broken and sore.

3.The handshaker who won’t let go until they’e pulled you towards someone else they think you should shake hands with.

4.The person who thinks they need to shake your entire body in order to qualify as a handshake. (Way too excited.)

5. The person who has sweaty palms when they shake your hand and says, “Hi I’m feeling kind of sick today.”